Hail to None of the Above

It's odd being out here in Japan waiting for the results of Tuesday's vote in the US, not least because it is Wednesday here already. As a former newspaper journalist I can attest to the tedium of collating local council results while wishing I could be at home to watch the national results on the telly. This time round I will be watching the results as best I can exclusively via the internet, and you can too with the handy widget I've bolted onto the bottom of this post, or watch the TV above. I will miss the traditional newsroom feast of delivery pizza, but I will raise a glass if the best man does indeed win.

By the way, the voting is complete in the Tower Tales presidential poll. If its unfeasible results from 24 votes cast sometime in the last 185 days were replicated in real life, here is what would have happened:

• In fourth place with 8 percent of the popular vote: John McCain
• Third, with 20 percent: Hillary Clinton
• Second, with  29 percent: Barack Obama
  
• First, with 41 percent: None of the Above.

What's my name?

In recognition of getting nearly 1,000 hits to this blog (as of writing, the counter stands at 997), I'm thinking of re-branding myself. Yes, I need a new handle, something worthy of my position as Sherriff-sensei and self-appointed window on my corner of the world. So, after a thrilling response to my request for names for my online persona, I've whittled the suggestions down to three and you can vote on which ones you like at the right of the blog. You have only got a week mind, so get voting. By the way, in keeping with current Mugabe-Bush thinking on democracy, I may ignore the popular vote entirely and give myself another title altogether.

Names to reckon with MK II

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Names to reckon with

While racing through a bowl of spaghetti at lunch today - between lessons teaching toddlers the difference between up and down; and adults the difference between present continuous and present simple (I am drinking a bottle of wine vs I drink a bottle of wine every night) - I had a chance to compile a list of strange but true names of people that I or my wife have known. OK, they are not in the league of Major Bumsore (author of Sliding Down the Banister) or Theresa Green, the environmentalist, but these names have the added value of being real. And the winners are... honourable mention Johnny Dollar (an American reporter colleague of mine), in third place Ronald MacDonald (my brother's English teacher), second place Dave Mountainhike (my wife's colleague at Toyota) and towering above the rest is... Chez Burger (an American working for Johnson and Johnson). Have you got any to add? 

Round One to Obama

So, Barack Obama leads the charge to put someone vaguely moral in the White House. Listening to his speeches and looking at him stare meaningfully off into the distance, I think he seems much more Presidential than the headmistress-like Hillary. Is America ready to vote for a black candidate? I don't know, but all I would say is that he out-Clintoned Clinton. Sixteen years ago, Bill could legitimately package himself as something new, exciting and different. This time round, his wife was campaigning as someone old, reliable and familiar, hardly likely to excite voters. But never mind Hillary, you are still leading the Tower Tales poll. By the way, I get all my political views from a balanced news source, The Onion. Click here for their latest updates on the War for the White House, and more on Obama's meaningful gaze.